Thursday, March 11, 2010


Something’s where
the record skips
the words that hang
on thirsty lips

unsettled by
peculiar ease

Something scrapes
against the pane
that anyone
could well explain

(but leave it to
a fool like me
to ruminate
the possibly)

Something’s sticking
in my skin
the wrinkle of
a stifled grin

the splinter of
what’s left to say
as Something whispers
walk away


Karen said...

One of the things I like most about your work is that you manage every time to transport me to an imagined reality full of that implicit Something, that unsettled and unsettling Something, that nebulous, creative, wonderful Something.

Julie said...

Now I'm agreeing with Karen this week. "Wonderful" is a great way to put it. Wonderful work and soul. I've felt that splinter of what's left to say so many times. Then something does whisper "walk away." Sometimes I heed it. Sometimes I don't. I often regret it when I don't.

The last two stanzas are my favorites. I think. Every time I go back and look, I see more that I love. Awesome title, too.

RachelW said...

Oh, this is neat! I feel like there's a lesson in this for me somewhere, if only I'd really listen, haha!

Sarah Hina said...

It's very hard to name the nameless, to viscerally recreate a tug and tension through the mere exercise of words (though maybe it's the unknowable that's so implicitly twined to such a feeling?). Anyway, you nailed it here. I felt this one in the gut. And that's definitely something.

The first and last stanzas tied it together perfectly. What can't be said finding its match in what we hear, anyway. Brilliantly done. :)

maaga..... said...

sweet like sugarcane!

Nevine said...

What struck me most about this piece was the very strong images you created in stanzas 1, 3, and 5. When I am reading words and I can see that image, especially an image that is this surreal, then you've done quite something. And you have, Joaquin. You always leave me with images, and with thoughts. And they can be quite haunting, sometimes. Quite...


joaquin carvel said...

karen - you are too kind. and, of course, that's ok by me. thank you!

julie - yep - you know that something too. it's tricky. thank you, and thanks for pointing out the title.

rachel - ha! thank you!

sarah - thank you - i think the gut is where it mostly lives.

maaga - hey! good to see you again - and thanks!

nevine - that, from you, is remarkable. thank you.

Aniket said...

For once, I loved the second last stanza more than the last one...

"Something’s sticking
in my skin
the wrinkle of
a stifled grin"

I grinned for a long time reading and re-reading this. This is a work of art.