Spun out at the intersection
of Mistakes
and Misdirection
pealing tires pouring smoke
as the brakes
howl through the spokes
twisted mouth of the suspension
pulled apart by
torque and tension
it’s a cold and quiet night
not another soul in sight
just a silent swirl of dust
falling back to road and rust
Closed my eyes, held on and skated
through the cyclone
I created
wheel slipping through my fist
wrenching something
in my wrist
hoped and prayed and swore and guessed
‘til it shuddered
to a rest
it’s a cold and quiet night
not another soul in sight
signal flashing overhead
dim and doubtful pools of red
Didn’t think to try the engine
left the keys
in the ignition
just collected what I could
of my shredded wits
and stood
didn’t even shut the door
tried to stagger
to Before
it’s a cold and quiet night
not another soul in sight
trying to get where I can’t go
from someplace that I don’t know
Somewhere southeast of Disgrace
when a streetlamp
lit my face
on a corner, felt a breeze
read the signs and
hit my knees;
broke down at the intersection
of Renewal
and Redemption
8 comments:
Rhyming genius, as ever! I love this one - especially the last stanza.
Strangely, I've been working on a poem about a breakdown too, but I think mine's destined to stay as one of my 'unfinisheds'...
Anyway, just wanted to say you just keep getting better-your well crafted work keeps me coming back for more :)
Unbelievable poetry! You are the master, and I hope you are mastering whatever life has thrown in your way.
xoxo
This is fantastic.
it’s a cold and quiet night
not another soul in sight
signal flashing overhead
dim and doubtful pools of red
Amazing how you can take a metaphor, and slip something gritty and palpable and throbbingly present inside of it. I think a lot of that is in the pulse of your rhythms and the rawness of the verbs. There's a violence to this that makes the ending so, so sweet. As if the destination could only be reached after one stopped struggling to try and escape it.
Really happy to see this one.
Okay, I guess we're going to pick the entire poem by selecting the lines we liked the most. Here goes mine :
"trying to get where I can’t go
from someplace that I don’t know"
Its another one for me to study, as not a word in there is a word I'll have to think for a moment to sink in its significance to the passage. It is effortless reading and provides maximum satisfaction to my cerebral taste-buds. :)
As always, you're awesome. Do you have enough for another self-published book? And I'm sure if only the right people get to read your stuff, why won't they'll publish these in the mainstream publications. I'm tempted to leave my job and be your agent just on the prospect of all the money you can make for me. :D
It's Thursday. We're waiting...
ink champ - i don't know if i'd call it "genius", but i'm far too polite to argue. :) seriously, though, thank you - "getting better" is the hope and one of the best compliments. (i have a stack of unfinisheds too - they're great to sift through when the muse isn't sparking anything new. some of this stuff lays around in bits and pieces for months / years.)
karen - (humble bow) - thank you! i'm not mastering much, but things are turning - i'm pretty sure the sun has finally worked its way back out. :) (oh, sorry about that - little late today....)
sarah - wow. thank you. it is kinda funny how that works out - how sometimes it takes letting go to finally grab hold of something - but yeah. i was actually kind of happy to finish it.
aniket - you're awesome. thank you - and if you can make any money off these, you're a smarter man than i. i probably do have enough for another book by now - wait - is that clammoring? :) (secret: i wanted to try to put out a book of all-new poems - about a year later, i have a stash of maybe 12. so, um, it may be a while.)
you captured that lost feeling and troubled emotions very well at the intersection or should i say crossroad.
i am getting some ideas from you on rhyming as it is something i want to improve on.
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