Thursday, May 13, 2010

Explame


I never felt the feelings
that you did and that I should
and I don’t know what that makes me
but I’m sure it isn’t good

I’m sorry that I’m sorry
is all I had to say -
if I wasn’t late or missing
I was getting in the way

I never meant to hurt you
but that’s all that I seemed to do
I could never find the right words
but I’m sure you have a few

I’m sorry that I’m sorry
is all I could express -
if I wasn’t getting mucked up
I was making you a mess


I never saw the future
that you seemed to see in me
and it’s not for lack of trying
there’s just nothing there to see

I’m sorry that I’m sorry
is the state I’m always in -
if I wasn’t at a standstill
I was in a tailspin


and now I’m doin’ 90
I’ve got no idea where
but it isn’t like I left you –
I was never
really
there

[from the archives. november 1996]

3 comments:

utopianfragments said...

so old stuff man..
i think if i were to write at that time
my theme must have been the same
but not close to to your ability..

Silly Girl said...

the Absence... that's a constant presence in our lives these days.

Julie said...

Big applause and another thanks for posting throughout May! The final stanza is great and catches me by surprise, which is a good thing as a reader.

"I'm sorry that I'm sorry" reminds me of a few people I've known who are sorry...but not sorry enough to change their ways. It makes me feel much sympathy for the "you" in the poem. Or... Again, you fill my head with many stories.